Mistaken identity

When you’re stuck in a bad environment long enough, the habits and mindsets needed to cope and work around said environment starts to become part of your identity.

You start to believe things about yourself that you never were.

“I don’t enjoy the outdoors anymore”, but actually the outdoors available to you and your family were simply too uninspiring, too uncomfortable, and too inconvenient.

“I hate driving”, but actually you just hate driving in Singapore—the impatience, the aggressiveness, the lack of kindness, the high density, the lack of space. You’re okay with driving when everyone’s chill and gracious on wide open roads. Bonus: Driving is fun when you’re exploring, getting off the beaten track, going on adventures, discovering new places in the countryside where only cars can bring you.

“I have no friends, I’m an introvert”, but actually you’re living in the wrong place. The friends you want to meet had relocated, and the ones to befriend are in another country/city.

“I love to work”, but actually you were stuck in survival mode in an environment that kept reminding you of it. And when you left said environment, you realise you were held captive by work, like some sort of Stockholm’s Syndrome, and actually want to enjoy life and live a little.

I was never any of those things.
Yet in past years I had come to believe them about myself.
Believed it a little too deeply.

A case of mistaken identity.

The influence of the external environment is real.
Walk away.
Quickly.
Go bankrupt doing so if you have to.
It’ll be for the best ultimately.

Forwards!