Hello loneliness, my friend

I used to run away from loneliness, distract myself, and keep myself busy so that I did not have to meet loneliness. I kept pushing her away because she felt uncomfortable.

However, yesterday I finally dared to meet loneliness.
As she keeps showing up, I thought I might as well talk to her.

And what she told me surprised me!

She doesn’t want me to feel bad or alone. The contrary!
She wants to make me aware that I have lost connection to myself.

You see, in German we call her “Einsamkeit”, and the word comes from being one with oneself. It used to be something monks, Einsiedler (hermits), and others would aspire to.

When we’re with others, and it’s not safe to be 100% ourselves, it can happen that we abandon ourselves to fit in; that’s why we can feel lonely amidst people or in relationships.

So the next time I feel lonely, I thank “loneliness” for giving me the sign to reconnect with myself.

And just like that, I see loneliness no longer as a feeling to push away but as valuable feedback to go inward, to feel into my heart and connect with my needs.