Curse of the gifted

This week I’ve repeated a video about ten times, trying to mine it for every last bit of useful insight. In the video Dr. Alok Kanojia discusses Why Potential Is Paralyzing with a group of “burnt-out gifted kids” and explains why gifted children are actually special needs kids.

I identify with the topic. My grade school was tiny because it served the tribal lands where I grew up. Unlike other rural community schools, ours didn’t get gobbled up by larger school districts. But because I was labeled “gifted” I traveled once each week to a larger school to attend the gifted and talented program.

I was smart, but I sucked at school.

The problem is, when learning comes easy early on, a gifted kid rarely learns good study habits. My brother was one year ahead of me in school and he basically taught me to read before I entered kindergarten. From there I was always a step ahead of everyone without having to exert much effort.

But there comes a reckoning.

I graduated valedictorian of my eighth grade class of three. Then I started private school and became a solid middle of the road student. I later made it into a top-tier high school that selected students from the whole state. And that’s where I started flunking.

I lasted one semester there. And I only made it through one year of college before I dropped out and started hitchhiking around the country.

My study skills are much better now, but I still recognize a lot of the other insights this video presents, like having inflated expectations of my own potential.

Later I want to look more closely at the distinction he makes between motivation systems and the brain circuit that makes cost/benefit decisions. He tells the gifted kids on this panel that much of their problems can be traced back to this circuit. They get paralyzed when they choose because they’re making calculations about the future utility (or futility) of their actions.

“Should I act or not act?” they say. The answer comes back, “It’s probably better not to act.”

Especially when, day by day, they fall further and further behind their potential.